Seriously? How is this my life?

I don't think I can even express how ridiculous my life is nowadays. Sometimes I look back on these posts and realize that I often lead a crazy life. Whether it is something my children do at school or something the Spaniards do in life, I am always amazed. I've debated for a few days how to retell the story of my Tuesday. I thought maybe I'd post a tiny bit of the subject and tell readers to email me if they wanted details. I also thought about censoring the story a little bit based on the demographic. And then it hit me, I haven't really censored much else in this blog (which is evident) and I wouldn't be keeping true to myself if I didn't put in the whole story. So without further adieu here goes nothing:
[This post is dedicated to my grandma and my aunt Lydia]

Tuesday:
On Mondays and Tuesdays I read to the Infantil kids in the morning for a half an hour each per class. Only three classes in total so the 30 minutes doesn't seem to take too long. They pretty much love anything you do and every week its like Christmas becasue you're are there. Great self-esteem boost on crappy mornings. So I head off to the second 5 year old class with my Old McDonald book ready to enlighten these little minds (haha). As I'm reviewing their names and ages one little boy, I'll call him 'H', says something to me that I missed. So I asked him to repeat what he was saying and it went something like this (clearly I'm translating): "Teacher, you have huge boobs." ...and he used his arms to demonstrate just how big. I glance at the permanent teacher and she has her head down looking at papers. (Later she told me that she was so embarrassed and was hoping I didn't understand).
Well that 30 minutes dragged on after I told 'H' he couldn't say that, but he didn't understand me. I returned to the English room and told my counterparts...they found it hysterical. Story's over right? Wrong!

After Recreo I went to my 1st grade class to teach them about their families. Earlier in the week I had given them a great laugh talking about my family. First, they couldn't understand how my parents could possibly have names like Monqiue and Keith, it just blew their minds. Second, having not one but two grandfathers whose names began with 'W' is a hard concept to grasp. The 'W' is not a popular letter in the Spanish language and for names it is unheard of, except in my case. But I will say that in the end I won out when I had to choose one uncle to tell them about. Although I have many great uncles to choose from I had to go with my uncle Mickey, for obvious reasons. I was greeted with cheers and hysterics becuase of...MICKEY MOUSE!!! While the rest of my family might not have a high approval rating from my 6 year olds, my uncle Mickey has won them over.
Anyways, back to the story. At the end of this class they were instructed to draw themselves and talk about their features. To get them started I decided to draw a picture of myself on the board (I'm becoming a great chalk artist). I was explaining to them to draw their hair color and eye color, and I even gave myself earrings. While I'm finishing the last touches on my full length drawing I hear one girl, we'll call her 'P', tell me she has a question. "Melanie, Where are your boobs? You have big boobs, why didn't you draw them too? You have to have your boobs!" So the teacher tells her she's rude and that she can't say that to me and I just laugh. I explain to the teacher what happened in the morning and said that I'm giving up.
Back to the English room to hear more laughing and then a discussion about why this was happening today. What was different about today? Was it my clothing? For the record, I was wearing a white teeshirt and a button up sweater! Story ends here? Obviously not!

After lunch I went to gym class with my 2nd graders and Elena. She informs me that the class is free time for them because it's right before the break and neither of us had anything planned. So we're sitting in the circle while the kids are fooling around and I tell her about the events of my day.
We're having a good laugh when out of no where four or five of the students put their knees inside their teeshirts giving them the appearance of boobs and start saying "I'm Melanie, I'm Melanie!" and hobbling around the group. I officially lost it. I was literally on the floor in hysterics, Elena as well, because we could not believe what we were seeing.
This Tuesday was by far the most ridiculous day of my life and it was at the hands of small children. At first I started to think how ridiculous it was that these children have no filter. Then as the day progressed I gave up analyzing any of it and just went with the flow. Although, I have to admit, if they're just noticing now then maybe we have bigger problems on our hands to deal with...

Also, telling the story in English is bad enough, but when you have to say it in Spanish it gets that much more embarrassing. Fantastic! I brought one of my coworkers to tears he was laughing so hard.

The rest of the week continued in this crazy way and now I'm on Easter break, (or Semana Santa). I leave on Monday for someplace great but you'll have to wait till I get back to know where exactly it is...

Negative: March Madness is almost over and I might lose in my pool to a Spaniard.

Positive: Learning that 'grillos' are always black.