My first day back was a Thursday and my busiest day so I was able to see most of my students and listened to them go on about what the Three Kings brought them. Tuesday, January 6th was Three King's Day so everything was still fresh in their minds.
One thing I need to mention is that the next day, Friday, I woke up to about three inches of snow in Madrid center. Very exciting since I had only seen flurries a month before and I was starting to miss it.
Well unfortunately Madrid is not known for its snow and they were in shock. People were walking the streets with umbrellas and just being generally scared. I found out that some teachers were too afraid to make it into work and because of this they turned children away at the door because there weren't enough adults. Of the teachers who did make it in, most left their cars in Rivas because the four inches of snow there was too much, too dangerous. I can not even describe to you the ridicule Lisa and I bestowed on these people when we came to school the following Monday. The teachers were still talking about it as if it had been the Blizzard of '78. Madrileños and snow equals ridiculous.
Seeing as how January is almost over I figured I'd summarize what has happened with my classes. {quotes from my children are translated from Spanish for story-telling purposes}
3A-They have moved on to a new unit in Science class that covers solids, liquids, and gases. Now clearly Mary, the head teacher, would demonstrate not feeling well and what sometimes happens when you don't. This was met with yells to know how to say "tirarse un pedo" in English. Mary just put a finger to her lips to let them know she wasn't telling. And I being the unsuspecting genius that I am said, "It's a secret." What happens next? Well my class went around saying "I'm SECRETING!!!" for the rest of the day!
My favorite little Alex is in Judo after school on Mondays and since we are already in the gym at the end of the day he changes after P.E. Unsuspectingly I walked in to the gym to check on him and was attacked. Atleast for the rest of this year I will still be able to hold his head and have him not be able to touch me, but next year who knows. When I finally stopped laughing and closed him off in the gym I thought I was at peace. Next thing I know while I'm talking to Elena he comes flying out the other door karating kicking in the air. It was slow motion just like in the movies and it seemed like he travelled from the door to me all 15 ft. in the air! I thought I was going to burst I was laughing so hard. Now during regular class on Monday he'll look at me from across the room and hold up his Judo bag and say, "Melanie, remember last Monday." Fact: my kids have it in for me.
Lesson from 3A: Not to put on chapstick during class or otherwise I will be subjected to "Ohh Melanie, who are you kissing?" and 25 giggles.
3B-They were actually pretty calm this week except that I swear most of them lost a tooth during one class or another. Lots of blood and class disruptions. Instead of the tooth fairy in Spain they have the magic mouse who brings them no less than 10 euros a tooth. I think we can all agree that we were gipped as children because I don't think I even got a dollar!
Lesson from 3B: They don't care about me ripping up their notes to each other, its the artwork that really makes them well up with tears.
3C-These little children are on my shit-list for real. Since Carmen was on maternaty leave like the three other pregnant teachers their schedule was messed up. I had to teach them a few times by myself and they were just terrible. The Spanish teacher that has to be there to supervise had no control over them and they took advantage of this. I really have nothing nice to say about them right now because they have been that horrible. Not just for me either, they have given every substitute a hard time and were even caught throwing paper out the windows. Maleducados! Finally, I had physical education taken away from them. Instead I practiced my Spanish while Elena spent 45 minutes straight yelling at them for being disrespectful to all the teachers and not taking advantage of opportunities in front of them and so on. Good times.
Lesson from 3C: Don't turn your back on them or they might pull a "Dangerous Minds" type action. (I'm kidding but I wouldn't put it past them.)
2A-My little darlings have been in full force since returning from vacation. A few of them have even taken to hanging on me and always asking to hold my hand during class, not normal for me. Well, my second class back one little clingy girl is holding my hand while I notice all the rest circling around me. My first reaction is that I'm a wounded gazelle on the Serengeti and they are hungry lions circling their prey so I get real nervous. Then I notice them pointing and laughing with each other and start to get really concerned. I'm having trouble understanding them because they're laughing so hard so I make the decision to wait until we get to the gym to figure it out. Well to my lovely surprise I have a rip in my pants in the butt. Fantastic! Thank goodness it's only first period and I haven't been walking around all day with my butt exposed. I take my zip-up and tie it around my waste to cover it until I can figure out something better. By now the whole class knows and it's the funniest thing they've all ever heard. Wonderful. When I left class I rushed around to ask anyone for a needle and thread (aguja and hilo), clearly I chose wisely who to ask because I knew I would have to explain. Finally, with no luck on fixing the problem, I settled on wearing Juanma's sweater all day because it was long enough to cover the hole. Probably an even bigger mistake. When I saw this class later in the day one girl asked if it was my father's sweater. Now if I was smart I would have answered 'yes' and that would have been the end of the discussion. Instead I told them no and that my father is too far away to give me his clothes. But that was OK because Laura says "NO, it's JUANMA'S. I saw him wearing it early today. I know it's his! Melanie why are you wearing his sweater...?" and so on. More giggles and I just walked away. Even yesterday they were still on my case about it because I was wearing another zip-up that isn't very girly. The same girls asked me flat out if it was Juanma's because they don't think I wear anything but his clothes anymore. I'll have to remember to get rid of my neutral colored clothes and to wear lots of pinks and purples from now on.
Lesson from 2A: Not to wear rings to class because they are convinced I am married and then they do nothing for the rest of class but talk about me love life.
2C- Nothing out of the ordinary with this class. They are exactly the same as when school started and since I only see them once a week they still don't trust me. I'm not even sure on all their names because I spend most of the time talking to the same ones, always the trouble makers and never have time to learn the other ones' names.
Lesson from 2C: Make them pair up with the opposite sex in P.E. and it really shuts them up. Oh to have cooties again!
1A B C- These three classes are grouped together because they've done the exact same stuff to me since I've been back:
"una cosa Melanie..." (one thing Melanie...) Is Steve your boyfriend? ...no
Do you have one?... no
Do you want one? ...no
Why not?, I have two.
...I tell you what kiddos, when I get one you'll all be the first to know!
Oh and little Celia in 1C is furious with me for not painting my nails like I did two weeks in a row. My life is under a microscope with these kids!
Lesson from the 1st grade: Never let them see me talking to a male teacher because I will never hear the end of it.
I think that about sums up my first few weeks back, crazy and eventful, and hysterical as always.
Negative: Being stuck in a small, hot, and stuffy classroom with 75 third graders to hear them do their musical performances for Peace day.
Positive: See above.
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